This is about questioning the ‘stories we tell ourselves’ —  the narratives that we construct in our minds about who we are, what we’re worth, how our life works, and what we’re capable of. In this exercise, we’re focusing on the negative cognitions that have become ingrained in us as limiting beliefs, embedded into every cell of our being as we accept them as true, regardless of their validity. The basis of these stories often stem from programming we received as a child or from conditioning we experience over time. And we filter our whole lives through them — every thought, emotion, and decision is informed by them — which means our limiting beliefs are creating our current reality.

Through the practice of becoming aware of your limiting beliefs, challenging them, and reprogramming your mind to accept that other possibilities exist, we begin to break free from those limitations and form new neural pathways. This is an exercise in personal expansion. It’s as simple as shifting your inner dialogue from “I can’t” to “it’s possible that I can” – because even you can’t argue that. 

1. On a piece of paper, draw a vertical line down the middle of the page. Title the left column ‘Negative Cognitions’ and the right column ‘Positive Cognitions.’ 

2. Now get quiet — listen to the inner critic that speaks in your mind — the one that questions, doubts, shames, or confines you. Do an internal audit, taking note of the undercurrent of negative self-talk that slips past your conscious mind on a daily basis. You can reference the New Beliefs List Examples pdf.

3. In the left column, write a list of those negative cognitions. 

4. In the right column, write the opposite — the positive, more expansive version of each cognition. 

  • Use language that you can believe to be true right now — this is not about lying to yourself, it’s about shifting your perception. You can continue to push the boundaries of your language overtime. A good sign that your system accepts a statement to be true is when you can feel your body exhale with relief when you say the new belief. 

5. Practice speaking the new beliefs aloud, especially anytime you catch yourself thinking or speaking the old belief. This is a practice of interruption – interrupt your limiting thought patterns every chance you get:

  • When you hear them in your mind, interrupt that inner voice by taking a breath and then speaking back to it with something like “excuse me, that's not true, can you please rephrase that?” And then say the new belief. 
  • When speaking to other people, if you catch yourself speaking through a lens of your old belief, stop what you're saying and correct yourself aloud. 

6. When you can, notice how your body feels as you speak the new beliefs (ex: relief, expansive, open, flowing, etc.). A physical connection via your emotions & sensations will help to reprogram your subconscious and reaffirm your new beliefs.

Take this further: 

  • Option 1: reveal your limiting beliefs to someone close to you. The stories we tell ourselves about ourselves is rarely how others see us. It can be incredibly impactful to hear how shockingly inaccurate our beliefs are by looking through the eyes of someone else. 
  • Option 2: if you wish to better understand your old beliefs, consider asking yourself why you believe them. Question where the beliefs originate from – did someone once tell you that’s how something is done, or that’s who you are, for example? This is the start of shadow work. 
  • Option 3: learn how to free yourself from the ego/inner voice that limits our consciousness and therefore reality in the book The Untethered Soul

TIP: Our inner voice is so ingrained in us that it can far too easily slip past our mind’s conscious awareness on a regular basis. So if challenging your beliefs or self-talk feels too difficult to manage right now, start with something smaller. Focus on something that has lower stakes, and make a game of it:

  • Pick a superfluous word you use often — such as "like" or a cuss word perhaps — and try cutting it out of your language for a week. This practice will help you become aware of your inner voice. You’ll start to notice that you think about your words before speaking them. In that brief moment, you have the power to change your choice of words. That awareness is key — it shows your ability to consciously change your mind (aka rewrite your thoughts). As you repeatedly interrupt any thoughts tied to your chosen word, you’ll get more comfortable recognizing that inner voice and understanding your power over it. When you're ready turn the spotlight toward your self-talk and begin reprogramming a belief.

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